Up Close and Personal
The monthly comment from CTM founder, Phillip Day

September's here, which for Britons usually means getting the garden furniture back in the shed and locking up the bikes in preparation for the long slide into winter. For Samantha and I, the British autumn's a moot point since we're off on our travels again Down Under for my Simple Changes Tour of Australia and New Zealand commencing 1st October. A chance to have two summers in one year! Have you got your tickets yet?

Malta GC was great, and I'd like to extend a special thank-you to the amazing Alfred Difesa and his team for their hospitality and hard work. There are rumours we're back on the island early in the New Year (Gozo this time also), so we'll keep you posted as things are firmed up. Ireland too was fantastic, and many thanks to the inestimable Trevor, Carol and Madeleine for their efforts in spreading the word and making the week so well-attended and enjoyable. It's easy to forget those who work so tirelessly behind the scenes. None of my touring would be possible without such enthusiastic and flawless support.

Right, on to this month's EClub. There's more research linking the consumption of processed meats to cancer. Into that mix you can toss everything to do with pork, that most distressed and toxic of meats.

You mean I can't eat bacon?
You can do what you like, but it's pork.
Blimey, hot dogs?
They're pork.
Prosciutto?
Pork.
Sausages?
Oh, for goodness sake…

Another bowel disease warning is out for the acne drug, (Ro)Accutane (how many does that make?). Air fresheners about the house can cause lung problems - official. Millions have diabetes type 2 and don't even know it, though they're suffering from all the symptoms of insulin resistance, which can include, but not be limited to: sugar addiction, trembling, anxiety, overweight, fatigue, wobbly if hungry, confusion, irritability, palpitations, blurred vision, cold hands and feet, low blood pressure, blackouts, angry outbursts, rambling speech, violence, peeing a little often, depression and inappropriate or strange behaviour (See The ABC's of Disease).

Also an interesting piece this month that links microwave smog to chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) and ME. Watch out also for the yeast connection with CFS (www.yeastconnection.com). Don't get your hopes up over the new immune system 'wonder-therapy' for cancer splattered across the newspapers this week (you can do the same thing naturally with diet and lifestyle changes without all the big bills, over-zealous medicos and their poisonous hospital grub). The unique Dr Tim O'Shea blasts a broadside into the menopause industry with a thought-provoking chapter not for the faint-hearted. And omega 3 fatty acids may be more effective at preventing sudden cardiac death that all those electronic gizmos they have on ER.

Concerning the European Union (for those Brits who haven't yet packed their bags in disgust), your membership of Europe's exclusive, corrupt, communistic and dictatorial Fourth Reich will cost you each £873 in the coming year according to latest figures - and for what? So farmers can be warned their farting cattle are wrecking the ozone layer (Ireland)? Or children forced to wear industrial-grade goggles before they have a conker fight? Read David Noakes' summary of the more serious things that will happen if we don't get off our kudus and do something about 'Europe'.

That's it! My new book, Simple Changes, is out on 1st October - just right for those who wish to stay tuned and keep their kangaroos in the top paddock. Crikey, I mourn Steve Irwin. By the time you read this, Tony Blair will have been sent to Guantanamo Bay and we'll have Gordon Laugh-a-Minute Brown as our new sub-regulus. Did you know it is impossible to lick your own elbow? Or that Coca Cola was originally green? Or that bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers were all invented by women?

Heavens, now I'm on a boat?

Happy September!

Phillip

PS: You just found it impossible to lick your own elbow, didn't you?